“Again I am compared”

The thing in this world, the utmost thing, again the same word comparing I heard from someone whom I can’t neglect my mother. From childhood everyone from our family compares me with so, so people, thinking I am the utmost bad creation in this world. They say during birth I was misplaced in hospital with different child, I am clicking pictures with girls and updating it in Face book; I am the worse creation with all fucking bad habits inbuilt on me. Like I am a Trojan Virus, which destroys everything when it gets contact with anything. Why they compare, well if I am doing something defiantly it will be something good not bad why can’t you understand mother? I am not that old one, I have been modified, learned and seen the world bitterness more clearly through my binocular specs. It’s harsh, worst, every field you get betrayal, another person is always ready to fuck you at any time at any moment in your job profile as competition is so high, no mercy for no one & no security of life. What to do, how to do, how to make you people understand what I am and what I want in life. I won’t make you unhappy mother just the simply words which I say to everyone try to understand me; I am not so bad mother. I love you and I promise I will make you happy, don’t hear what the fucking world says, listen and understand and show them your ideas, give dam to the society as they don’t feed us. Mother if you can look after yourself for 7 years alone, then why you think about this dam society as they just know how to fuck, they can’t give helping hands & if they do also they want something in return and that’s called money. There is nothing called humanity left, all selfish natured people left with sweet talks but multiple nature, duplicity in talks, selfish behavior, buttering skill.

I have failed in every aspect to make you all understand and definitely I have become a failure at last, nothing left in my hand except the sands.

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“Am I losing my Patience?”

Well got a job left it on the 2nd day, all worse things happening, argument with boss, no understanding & all messed up. Life was going in a proper way and again it changed its way of motion and took me somewhere else. I am not the best of all but still I am trying to be, am I failing myself or I am achieving the goal day by day? Multiple of question but with little suggestion, it’s so complicate to understand about this damn world and still I am unable to beat them in my words. I am writing day and night as many as much as I can; writing my thoughts, my suggestion, my understanding, my source of strength but it goes all in vain as me not so high as you are. Can see the sky, can stare the stars but can’t catch it as I fear to take a flight. Its worse, it’s simply worse, I am defiantly losing my patience

No job, no money, no proper handset and it’s been almost 3 months and I am still jobless, have given almost 15 interviews somewhere I was selected but no good package and somewhere I was not and the main thing is that in these 3 months I have written almost 10 articles. Well it’s the best what I can do instead of staying empty-headed coz. when there is nothing to do all bad ideas prevail to your head and which I don’t want.

Well Christmas and New Year is coming and I got 0 bucks in my pocket and lots of plan and ideas to celebrate it but how..? Writing so much about so many things but do anyone read it, I guess no one. No time for no one as all busy in their own fucking business and I’m just a job less. Just gaining everyday strength to fight and to understand people’s nature of thinking day by day. I might be wrong as my perception of seeing might be different, I might be too much practical about my life and ask everyone to be the same, I am the defaulter or I am not. Guess what I don’t know. Confusion’s are their but need to talk for a longer period to sort it out. Need more and more get together to know each other for a better future. Well its dam correct that you are the source code of my articles as you inspire me in every sector, every field, so that I can be better and do it, but am I capable of, am I having the strength to make it, am I lacking behind and can see all going with a nitro speed.

Yea it’s true as it’s hard to find job in own hometown, where you know if you don’t have any link or any sort of knowing you won’t get any job and if you get also you won’t get a good package. “Oh God show me the path so that I can meet it and make my destiny and show the world that I am too also good in my business.”

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“Love Life or Sentenced to Death, it’s my path to hell”

“Why we compare them with others, we stick to them and want to with them forever but do they understand it, we try to understand our love ones from every corner and try to make them come over it but do they try for you, we fight for our love, we say why you stare to others when I am with you, why we can’t understand or trust or have faith on him/her, why we desperately want to meet her/him but they don’t understand us, why we hear all allegations from them and still love them like hell till we exist, why?” Well these are the question which comes to my mind when I am alone and think what they say is I am that  or I am something else what I know about myself. I guess and most often I am correct about the situation, I try to make them alert about the horrible atmosphere they are sticking to and guide them the path of security, so am I doing something wrong? I know I am guilty and for my sins I am paying till yet and I will. I believe in my words and I prove it by doing it that’s why I am in my hometown, I am as simply as I speak and I am not so complicated.

People say, “I play smart, I am having attitude problem, I am an egoistic person, I am crazy for girls, but before saying that do they know me properly or they not”. Yes, I did some blunder mistakes which make you say so but is it really what I am or you don’t know me? Why they say that after sex we will forget them completely, is life made them so to understand for everyone or some are different? I loved you and I will always as I believe my soul is with you and I can’t forget you. I betrayed you I agreed but I came back for you also leaving everything and now I am here and I will be with you forever till I exist.

“I am the architect of my own destruction”, and I know that pretty well coz. after doing all good deeds still I am the defaulter in every sector. I just can say I am a, “Fucking Jedi a” and I believe in myself and seen the world more clearly through my binocular specs. You can’t make me wrong when I know I have not done anything bad. Just my sins are there as a barrier which puts me in a wrong position every time. But I thing honey I am saying to you I loved you and I am now back for you till I exist, u believe or not I don’t know, but whenever u turn beside you will always find me. “Love you honey”.

love is in the air